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Putting yourself first isn’t so bad.

June 12th, 2009

Updates: website templates – unrequested website reviews

You know, sometimes we forget about our own happiness. We grow accustomed to putting everyone before us and ensuring everyone else’s happiness. But at what cost? Being selfless is an admiring quality and not everyone has it, but I am a firm believer in putting yourself first. I don’t mean it as in be selfish and say “forget everyone else”, but I believe sometimes you have to put your needs and wants first. Some people try too hard to please everyone. You cannot please everyone in life, you just cannot. When you lose yourself in the process of helping others, that’s a problem.

^ I wrote that almost half a year ago (I have a habit of jotting down blog ideas & never finishing them :tongue: ). I would’ve liked to continue it, but I don’t have any inspiration whatsoever to complete it…

So, I added the layouts back. There’s only a few though (and only a couple of new ones). I am still in the process of adjusting the coding with the other ones. I also added the tutorial section and hopefully soon enough, I’ll create some video tutorials. The PNG section is still on its way, but it hasn’t been updated in ages. I might just get rid of it all together, who knows. I know there’s a few kinks I need to work out with wordpress (the poll page, the “thread” plugin), but do not fear- I’m working on it :wink: . Hope all is well with you all!

Tags: thoughts, updates

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PLEASE READ: Please refrain from posting irrelevant comments. I do not desire to receive comments like those, I prefer quality over quantity. If you've failed to do so, I may delete your comment or edit it as I see fit.

34 Responses to “Putting yourself first isn’t so bad.”

Mimi // June 12, 2009 at 5:57 pm

I feel like I need to work on the opposite – putting others before myself
Either one extreme isn’t good, balance is the key.

Mimi // June 12, 2009 at 6:21 pm

Ah, you’ve made what I was trying to say so simple- “balance”. That’s what I was trying to get at :smile: .

Kari // June 12, 2009 at 6:25 pm

I agree on the whole balance thing. Like, it’s okay to be “selfish” once in a while – just to think about yourself, like your own well being even, and then think about your friends and family. Sometimes I feel like i’m basically at one extreme or another, so I hope to be able to control this later in life.

Rebecca // June 12, 2009 at 9:36 pm

I love the layouts, they are amazing!
I know this girl who tries to be everyone’s friend, she basically tries to please everyone. She can say she’s on your side, the next thing you know, she’s on the other person’s side. She needs to know that she can’t be friends with everyone, and that she should stop it.
xo

Rebecca // June 12, 2009 at 9:49 pm

oh and I did get the sidebar fixed
Yeah, I had to pay for a science competition, its just doing a test and then receiving a certificate , like if you get the highest, its ” HIgh Distinction” and blah. So when your doing a job interview and you hand over your achievements, at least you have something there which you can include.

Melissa // June 13, 2009 at 1:03 am

Self happiness is important, and that’s something I really need to work on. Thanks for sharing that to remind me :grin:

Jessyca // June 13, 2009 at 11:45 am

I definitely agree with the beginning of this…you can’t please everyone. However, sometimes I think that the most difficult thing is pleasing yourself. I do agree that balance is the most important thing though…no matter what you do. :smile:

MK // June 13, 2009 at 7:43 pm

I agree that extremes are bad. Yin and Yang. The balance is something you need in everything.

Monet // June 14, 2009 at 12:26 am

I agree with you. I’m one of the people who try to take others into consideration but there are times when I put myself and just choose not to care about others. The thing is I end up feeling self but I can’t help but want to make myself happy, I mean I can’t spend my life making others happy while I’m miserable. It’s just not happening.

Oh and question [if you read this comment] where did you get the plugging that lets you add the reply button to comments?

Monet // June 14, 2009 at 12:26 am

I mean to say I end up feeling selfish*

Mimi // June 14, 2009 at 8:31 am

You can find it here- http://blog.2i2j.com/plugins/wordpress-thread-comment :).

Monet // June 14, 2009 at 12:10 pm

Thanks so much! I really appreciate it!

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Nina // June 14, 2009 at 4:53 am

Hey there Mimi
Thanks for answering my “Questions” blog, I enjoyed reading your answers.

Love the new site, congratulations on the opening! I love the theme. I changed your links BTW.

Nice updates.
I agree, it’s important to think about yourself for a change… Although sometimes, you often forget about what you want and what you need!
Unfortunately, I’m one of those people, and i usually never get noticed for anything good I do for people!

Peace.

Simran nagra // June 14, 2009 at 11:49 am

Hi Mimi, i dont think i have ever spoken to you but i just wanted to say that i really appreiciate the use of your layouts, they have been a great help to me!

Catherine // June 14, 2009 at 12:45 pm

I agree with you. I think it needs balanace. Not to think about yourself too much all the time, but not to do things that don’t help you at all. I think I need to work on that, cos I tend to do things too much to please other people even if I don’t want to do it.

Simone // June 14, 2009 at 1:46 pm

i think you should please yourself before others . but i don’t understand how some go way out of their way to please others and often stress themselves out . but i do understand when parents believe putting their children first and themselves last .

Vanessa // June 15, 2009 at 3:57 pm

I tend to put others infront of myself sometimes. But that’s only for my niece’s. Since their mother is too ‘busy” having her head up some guys ass..

Brianna // June 15, 2009 at 4:58 pm

Heey there!
I really agree with the statement above. it’s so true that sometimes, all you gotta’ do is trust yourself… because in the end that’s what it comes down to. The only person in this world that you can fully count on for what you want/need is yourself. But, then again, it’s always nice to help others find what they want/need. It’s just that sometimes, I guess, you’ve gotta let them walk their own path, you know?
Sorry ; I didn’t mean to ramble!

Melissa // June 16, 2009 at 8:55 am

Hi there! Thought about visiting your site again, just to see, how it developped. Great!

I know enough selfish people. I hate those who’s lives only consist of backbiting and going shopping. That’s pathetic when they got nothing else to do :laugh:. Otherwise I don’t think it’s funny to be selfless all the time so you have to find a middle course.

Hope you’re fine.
Melissa

Fidelia // June 18, 2009 at 1:05 pm

Hey what host do you use?

Mimi // June 18, 2009 at 7:50 pm

My friend Penita hosts me. If you need a host, I have some listed @ http://douxriens.com/visitor/hosts.php. If you need a subdomain, I can host ya, too.

Fidelia // June 23, 2009 at 2:21 pm

thanks for the offer…but I’ve had like 3 hosts and something has gone wrong each time and my sites have been deleted so I’m probably just going to use 1and1.com

Ivy // June 18, 2009 at 10:33 pm

I CHANGED MY LINK! DON’T YELL AT ME!

okay but yes, I put others before myself. Sadly enough how you can only write a paragraph and I still think so much of myself and my life. lol, well yeah, i’m putting myself up on a higher level. i refuse to put myself last anymore. :smile:

clairessa // June 18, 2009 at 11:12 pm

sorry about not commenting on the blog (ill be back later lol) but your layouts are messed up. you might want to check them out :0

Mimi // June 19, 2009 at 7:32 am

Thanks for letting me know. Someone else e-mailed me about this, too. I have no idea what happened but it seems like my PHP includes’ path changed when my site experienced downtime O_o.

Amber // June 20, 2009 at 11:11 am

Putting yourself first some times is necessary. When you constantly allow people to walk all over you, it makes you seem like a weaker person. When you always sacrifice and are constantly doing things for others without getting them back in return, it can ultimately drive you insane. And your right, you can’t please everyone. No matter how hard you try and make everyone in your life happy, thats just unrealistic. Especially when your making yourself unhappy in the process.

Tia // June 21, 2009 at 12:34 am

Hey there, what’s going? not much here. I like your new layout! The 12th was my brother’s birthday, so happy late birthday to him! Bye.

Tia // June 21, 2009 at 12:35 am

P.s. where did you get this comment box thing? Jw. :grin:

Ran // June 21, 2009 at 6:34 pm

I’m good. That’s statement above is true, and maybe it’s already complete.

Gianna // June 22, 2009 at 11:32 am

WOW! Your new site is AMAZING!!!

Kay // June 22, 2009 at 1:56 pm

Hello dear. I am using one of your Templates. Of course I will give full credit. Don’t mind if I link right back to you.

I love the colors of your layout now. Very pretty.

Call me selfish but I put myself first before anyone. I’ve learned that no one appreciates or acknowledge what I do for them. A simple thank you is fine with me. I don’t even get that. I use to go above and beyond. I cut that out long time ago. Its very draining to give and never once get a thank you.

Aaron // June 23, 2009 at 7:50 am

I agree with you… I feel like I try my best to make my mom happy but I’m not happy myself. However, I feel like I’ll just keep trying to keep her happy… that’s pretty much all I care about at home.

Samantha // July 7, 2009 at 7:36 pm

That’s not easy for me. Not to sound cocky, but lots of people say I’m pretty selfless. For me, I just don’t have the heart to put myself first. I just don’t have the will power, something that’s greatly required. I was also wondering, Mimi, if you would ever considering adding more brushes when you get a chance. I am sure you’re busy (as am I), but it can’t be too bad either. I miss vejc-design.com. The PNG’s and brushes were soo good.

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34 Responses to “Putting yourself first isn’t so bad.”